“I really feel like I am doing all of the heavy lifting on this friendship”
Pricey Eve 6 Man,
I have been Ok.'s finest good friend for 17 years. We're lengthy distance buddies – she's in Georgia, I am in Lengthy Island. She has come to go to us a number of instances, however our friendship is especially via electronic mail, textual content and cellphone. We used to speak on daily basis, however as our lives acquired busier and the years handed, it was just a few instances per week, then as soon as per week.
Our friendship is deep. She is aware of issues about me that nobody else is aware of. For greater than a decade, we now have shared particulars of our lives and people of our youngsters. We have been via breakups collectively. We talked to one another about our respective edges.
We had instances after we drifted aside, however we at all times got here again to one another, each apologizing for not prioritizing our friendship higher. Properly, Ok. simply went via a nasty breakup (they have been engaged and dwelling collectively), and he or she has some well being points. I do know she likes house when she's extraordinarily harassed, so I am giving it to her.
The final time we spoke, she instructed me she was going via a tough time and he or she was sorry that she wasn't an excellent good friend. I instructed her that I'd at all times be there for her when she was emotionally prepared to speak. I did not say something about my very own well being scare or fragile emotional state as a result of I did not wish to burden her with my issues when she clearly had hers.
Two weeks handed and I hadn't heard from her, so I despatched a fast textual content asking if every thing was okay. She mentioned she was advantageous and requested me to electronic mail her an replace on my well being points and my kids. So I did. It was two and a half weeks in the past. I have not heard from her since.
This is not the primary time I really feel like I am doing all of the heavy lifting on this friendship. I have been upset about this earlier than. However that is the primary time she's felt like she's actively ignoring me, and I actually suppose our relationship has turn out to be a burden on her, simply one other factor on her very complete to-do checklist to verify off when she will be able to.
I do not wish to be that. I might fairly finish the friendship for good than be kicked out each two weeks by her. However how one can method it? Do I let her know the way I really feel and add to her emotions of guilt in direction of us, or do I simply let the friendship stagnate?
I really feel too previous for all this. I believed when you have been older, friendships have been simpler. I don't suppose so. Respect any recommendation you can provide me.
— I really feel like a ghost